If we’re dating there is like a 90% chance that I’ll watch your tv shows with you and make out with you during commercial breaks and fall asleep on your lap halfway through the program.
what would the other 10% be
me eating all your food
one time I was really high and took a hot bath and I closed my eyes and imagined myself as a noodle floating in hot soup
It’s not the house that’s haunted. It’s your son.
i refuse to be seen in public without at least four people following me snapping their fingers aggressively
new traffic light color ideas
- purple: turn around and go back
- mega green: like green except greener. it means that you have to double go.
- cyan: apply your turbo boosters and do a cool drift or get arrested by the car law
- black: sucks you into a cyber vortex where you have to do a bonus stage road and collect rings